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Skinflint sister - Stephan [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Stephan

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Skinflint sister [Mar. 29th, 2008|10:33 pm]
Stephan
Ok this just HAS to be one for the record books.

On Tuesday (first business day after Easter) I mailed my documents for upcoming inevitable drama. Friday my phone rang to say that they'd arrived.

Conversation as follows:

Myself: "Now what about my siblings? Have they sent anything in?"
Family member: "[First sister] has sent hers, but they haven't arrived yet. [Younger sister] wont send hers until she receives the stamps."
Myself: (Astonished pause) "Wha-... Are you telling me she wouldn't send her documents until someone mailed her stamps just so she would't have to pay for the postage herself?"
Family member: "Yeah that's right, you know her; a real little tight-arse."

That's it... I... ***CANNOT*** BE... GENETICALLY... RELATED...!!!
linkReply

Comments:
[User Picture]From: deckardcanine
2008-03-30 02:55 am (UTC)
It was kinda strange for me to read this less than an hour after watching Hable con ella. This movie includes a woman who leaves her house permanently after finding a snake there (even after someone else kills it) and a man who says he did his mother's cleansing and cosmetic routines for years because she was lazy. As a result, someone too cheap to buy stamps to write to family doesn't strike me as all that exotic at the moment.

But yeah, that's a good way for her to stay incommunicado with you.
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[User Picture]From: thefoxaroo
2008-03-30 03:43 am (UTC)
deckardcanine said:"It was kinda strange for me to read this less than an hour after watching Hable con ella. This movie includes a woman who leaves her house permanently after finding a snake there (even after someone else kills it) and a man who says he did his mother's cleansing and cosmetic routines for years because she was lazy. As a result, someone too cheap to buy stamps to write to family doesn't strike me as all that exotic at the moment.",

I could imagine an arachnaphobic's reaction to finding a dead funnelweb spider or black widow spider in his house, even a dead one. That sounds like phobia to me rather than laziness or a skinflint attitude.

The woman expecting her son to attend to her cleansing and cosmetic routines does sound very peculiar indeed, but frankly I find that it's still topped by my sister refusing to mail some documents until she waits for stamps to be posted all the way to her home just to avoid forking out a couple of dollars. Sheesh!!!
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[User Picture]From: deckardcanine
2008-03-30 03:58 am (UTC)
I realize that a phobia has nothing to do with laziness or greed. I cited it as a behavior extreme enough to make others look not so strange. (In truth, the woman wasn't all that attached to the place she fled. She'd recently had an aggravating break-up, and the house probably carried a lot of reminders.)

For your sister, there's a Shel Silverstein poem:

Lazy
lazy
lazy
lazy
lazy
lazy
Jane.
She
wants
a
drink
of
water,
so
she
waits
and
waits
and
waits
and
waits
for
it
to
rain.

(We see Jane lying with her mouth open beneath the words.)
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: thefoxaroo
2008-03-30 04:41 am (UTC)
That's quite good.

It actually reminds me very much of a classic piece of laziness from my brother...

We needed some disused railway track to test run one of his antique vehicles (little things that railway workmen used). Newcastle (Australia) used to have an abundance of such lines servicing the coal mines but they were gradually torn up and the only remaining accessible piece of track was overgrown with lantana (a ferral thicket). I'd already spent a day clearing a decent length of the track when my brother pointed out a tiny bridge further up the line where the rails had buckled. Now this rendered the bridge useless for a full-sized locomotive, but our little vehicle would only have needed the rails replaced with a couple of lengths of commonplace steel.

He didn't want to put in the effort for this tiny stint of repair.

I asked "What about all the work I've already done getting this far?"

He shrugged and with a lazy expression replied "We could always wait for a bushfire..."
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[User Picture]From: sleepyjohn00
2008-03-30 02:50 pm (UTC)

Pseudo-code for handling sister

IF [responsible_for_overall_project eq TRUE ]
THEN
send_over_postage_in_pennies_glued_to_a_board
ELSE
shake(head)
open(beverage)
marvel @ universe
check (blood_pressure)
while (blood_pressure > 130)
sip(beverage)
sleep (5 minutes)
blood_pressure = blood_pressure - 1
END WHILE
END IF
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: thefoxaroo
2008-03-30 07:53 pm (UTC)

Re: Pseudo-code for handling sister

If sister=avoidable then
Avoid
else
Handle like you would handle a package that says "Highly hazardous Biotoxic waste, this side up"
End_if

This code has proven bug free for the past 7 years. Pity I didn't apply the same algorithm a lot sooner for my brother.
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